Cookout Attendance Tips

  1. Don’t wear polyester if you intend to get anywhere near a flame.
  2. Keep the grillmaster refreshed.
  3. Do not hawk over the grill waiting for food. You just look greedy.
  4. Do not BYOB unless cleared by the host.
  5. There is no such thing as fashionably late. You might end up eating at McDonald’s.
  6. Every cookout is not a step show.
  7. Grillmasters, if you are using coal, do not start prepping when guest arrive unless it is agreed upon. They came to eat and fellowship.
  8. Grillmasters get breaks. Don’t get mad if your hamburger is not ready your way right away.
  9. If you want cheese on it then you gotta ask for it.
  10. Everyone does not like a black hot dog. They will be cooked to an in-between state and blackened per request.
  11. Whatever you want to put on your brat is your business.
  12. Keep all children away from the grill at all times.
  13. If you don’t know how to create a cool area on the grill to keep foods warm, then your grillmaster license is revoked.
  14. Steaks are cooked to order other wise medium well done.
  15. Do not say that you will bring china, napkins, or other plasticware if asked to bring a a side. And no Hawaiian Rolls you mooch.
  16. Good grillmasters smell like the good food they are cooking. It’s natural. Don’t ask them to go shower and change during the cookout.
  17. Don’t complain that there is meat on the grill due to you being a vegetarian. Grilling works for vegetables too.ย Plusย you can eat salad.
  18. If the grillmaster has deemed a piece of meat his/hers, then it belongs to them. Do not touch.
  19. Grilling is a labor of love, not slave labor.
  20. Eat and be merry.